As year 6 children they have become the senior year in their school, the big kids, but as year 7 children next year in their new schools they will again be the new kids on the block, small fish in a larger pond.

However, the option of not going is not an option, so the children have no choice but to move forward as part of the education and schooling.

At the service the deputy Head, Mr. Marshall, spoke of the Roma God Janus, and what he said not only had meaning for the children leaving, but also for many of us as parents who were also there. The following is an extract of Mr. Marshall’s short talk:

“Janus was a Roman God whom many will recognize due to the fact that he had 2 faces, one at the front and one at the back so he can see both ways.

He was the God of doors and gates and beginnings and endings, because the idea was that he could see forward and back, and because doors and gates open both ways, they let people in, and they let people out.

We often see pictures of Janus on the 1^st of January because the month of January is named after Janus, and a lot of people on New Years Eve will spend time looking back at the year past and looking forward to the year ahead.

Janus is also often worshipped at Harvest time, but he is also a symbol of important stages in children’s life as they go from one particular place to another, as they go through one stage, or from one school to another, and they would have called upon Janus in Roman times to give them good luck.

Janus’ temple in Rome had two doors, one at the west end and one at the east end of the building. The concept was that as the day began and the day ended the sun would shine through Janus’ temple. In the middle of the temple was a big statue of Janus with both faces of the statue facing each door.

The message that Janus carried was that those who fail to remember their history will often repeat it, and that was to say that we all learn by our past efforts. However, what Janus is also saying is that if we fail to learn from the lessons of the past we will continue to make the same mistakes in the future.

But one of the most important messages that I believe Janus was giving was that we should always face our future with new optimism, but not forget our past.”

As parents we have being helping our son prepare for this day, knowing it would come. We knew that the thought of leaving his past behind would be hard for him so we have been constantly building a positive and limitless future for him by helping and encouraging him to imagine what good things he will be doing at his new school. Our aim has been to balance the comfort of his past that he will leave behind with the excitement of the future that he is going to be gaining. At times we tip the balance in favour of what he can possibly expect to allow for the additional momentum to move him forward in his thought process.

I can still remember being a young 16 year-old standing on a train station platform waiting for the train to take me to Plymouth to join the Royal Navy. As the train drew near I could feel the anxiety increase. In knew that once I stepped onto it there would be no turning back. When the train stopped and the doors opened I had to decide whether I was going to take that one step that would propel me into the unknown. However, was it unknown territory? I had wanted to join the navy for many years. I had read all the brochures, been on open days, spoken to ex-sailors, and more importantly, I had created a vision in my mind of what it would be like. It was a strong positive image of being on a ship sailing across the sea with the sun setting in the distance. The desire to be part of that vision therefore outweighed the anxiety of not wanting to be. I took that one step that defined my life for the next twelve years. How many of you have done the same and are a better person for it?

As adults we can become set in our ways. Our habits and our routines become part of our everyday occurrence and we tend to live to the limitations of our familiarity. Sometimes we settle for being less than what we can be, at the expense of our potential, because of the fear of losing what we have gained. But is that because we have choice or because we have no choice? Are our limitations primarily because of what we could lose or what we could gain? 

Recently I was working with someone who was telling me about a friend of theirs who was seeing a therapist because they were unhappy with their life. According to the therapist the person had a fear of failure and it was this fear of failure that was holding them back. I was asked to see if I could help this person so I agreed. Having listened to them it soon became very apparent that they were not suffering from fear of failure. They were actually suffering from fear of success! In short, they were worried about what success would bring and how it may affect them. This reminded me of the now famous words attributed to Nelson Mandella that were written by Marianne Williamson which states:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, successful, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in EVERYONE! And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others!”

I believe that everything is created twice. Once by a thought, and secondly by an action. Before we can do anything we must first create the mental possibility. Once created it must be acted upon pro-actively and positively to move us in a direction towards what ever it is that we want to achieve. Thought without action is only dreaming, and the only difference between a dream and a goal is pro-active, positive action, not negative reactive reasoning.

It is not thoughts alone that define who we become but the actions we take that propel us towards our desired state.

Michael Flatly, the creator of Riverdance, is an example of someone who acted on his thoughts inspired by a desire to achieve. He was being interviewed on television about how he came to be so successful. He told the interviewer that when he was a child he used to daydream a lot in class and in his daydreams he pictured himself being successful. Once he had a clear picture of what he was going to do he took one step forward each day to achieve it.

Many individuals who attend our 5 day residential courses have informed us that outside of the aspect of learning new skills the time spent with us has helped them re-focus on their potential. Many individuals have gone on to do great things with their lives post training. One person, having never canoed before, decided to take up canoeing and is now a very accomplished canoeist, another decided to lose weight and is now 5 stone lighter, another has set themselves up in business and is earning more than they did in their employed role, and the list goes on.

We believe that all of us are better than we allow ourselves to be. Some of us spend so much time looking back that we fail to look positively to the future.

Some of you reading this will be thinking about a new career path, or about attending a particular course, but will find reasons not to do so. Some of you will be thinking about a new career path or attending a course and will find reasons to do so. Your decision, either way, will be based on what you have experienced in the past combined with what you think you will expect from the future. Where the past outweighs the future you will not attend. Where you future outweighs the past you will move forward. Either way your decision will define the direction of your future.

Many of you will know that when Vikings invaded they burnt their boats. They also use to burn bridges so that there was no way back. In other words what they were committed to was always moving forward by eliminating the option of going back.

The Roman God Janus looks both ways and one of the messages taught is that it is good to remember our past so that we don’t continually make the same mistakes in our future.

However, the important message is that we should learn from our past so that we can take that positive learning into our future. But like Janus we need to be looking at and into a future that is as compelling as a sunset that offers us the dawn of a new day, with all of the new opportunities and hopes that each new day brings. Otherwise we simply look forward to living in the past!

One of the poems read on the day by another of the teaching staff underpinned the staff’s commitment to ensuring that the children leaving their care for the last time, and I think it encapsulated all that is important in a persons ability to grow.

Let no-one steal your dreams

Let no-one tear apart the burning of ambition

The fires that drive within your heart

Let no-one steal your dreams

Let no-one tell you that you can’t

Let no-one hold you back

Let no-one tell you that you won’t

Set your sights high and keep them fixed

Set your sights on high

Let no-one steal your dreams

Your only limit is the sky

Follow your heart

Follow your soul

For only when you follow them will you feel truly whole

Set your sights and keep them fixed

Set your sights on high

Let no-one steal your dreams

Your only limit is the sky

In NLP there is a saying that what you focus on you get more of. Which direction will you be focusing on next week, next month or next year?